Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
You can't special order awesome
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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