He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
