Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
