oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
