she looked like the before picture.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
