Ambien. No doubt about it.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Randomize