My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Randomize