My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
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