Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
