tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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