it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
