??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
