For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
