but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
