I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
