stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
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