she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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