so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Two words: blizzard sex
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize
