You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Just cropdusted the office
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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