this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
