doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
