I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
