Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I wish I only lived at night.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
