Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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