Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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