He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
