Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
thus making me awesome and them whores
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
