I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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