Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
