I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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