Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
