You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
My bed smells like the plague
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
