Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
