I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
