Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
