just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Randomize
