I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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