i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
