Texts From Last Night

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  (618): View more from Illinois

  do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?

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  (618): do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like? http://tfl.nu/izmu
  Replies (28) Good night (570) Bad night (1026)
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  (925): View more from California

  So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.

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  (925): So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid. http://tfl.nu/x26d
  Replies (19) Good night (2237) Bad night (3315)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing

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  (203): we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing http://tfl.nu/99kd
  Replies (17) Good night (10865) Bad night (1124)
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  (631): View more from New York

  i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth

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  (631): i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth http://tfl.nu/bjm9
  Replies (16) Good night (959) Bad night (4233)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.

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  (610): we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again. http://tfl.nu/goom
  Replies (6) Good night (3204) Bad night (889)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.

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  (216): This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life. http://tfl.nu/j431
  Replies (54) Good night (7027) Bad night (977)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.

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  (651): So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it. http://tfl.nu/j4ss
  Replies (6) Good night (2110) Bad night (651)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.

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  (651): This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease. (507): Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits. http://tfl.nu/blof
  Replies (18) Good night (2731) Bad night (948)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.

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  (780): Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis. http://tfl.nu/lqrq
  Replies (8) Good night (2294) Bad night (617)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.

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  (508): You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up. http://tfl.nu/f7oz
  Replies (4) Good night (1989) Bad night (448)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?

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  (319): Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls? http://tfl.nu/s1mn
  Replies (14) Good night (1180) Bad night (545)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear

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  (512): my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear http://tfl.nu/fox2
  Replies (2) Good night (827) Bad night (341)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away

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  (541): There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away http://tfl.nu/55q1
  Replies (1) Good night (436) Bad night (280)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  "I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"

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  (313): "I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead" http://tfl.nu/zzf1
  Replies (3) Good night (329) Bad night (586)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.

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  (727): After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since. http://tfl.nu/pkb8
  Replies (2) Good night (210) Bad night (668)

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