i think my tv is drunk
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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