I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Randomize
