Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
