found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
he fucked my hip out of place.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
