Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
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