If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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