I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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