She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
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