so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
And then he peed in my hair
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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