OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
