The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
