Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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